Finding Home

My everyday leap of faith And conquering doubt My laughing so hard And crying out loud My over the hill sorrows And over the moon joys My late night prayer Early morning psalms And my entire day  of giving thanks My road trips of light And ponderous Forks in the road My happy singing, sunset skies And beautiful moonrise My daily dose Of soul conversations  and silence  that speak volumes My grounding earth And soaring high My deep within And farthest horizon Perfecting the shape Of my heart You, you and you All three of you, You are my "Life is beautiful" My "Life is good" You are my Unwavering truth. My beginning Middle End  Oh my boys, my boys I love you I love you I love you.

Close your eyes Breathe deep Unclench your fist Hear heaven speak Be still Remember as with everything else But especially this-- Love Takes time. Now rinse and repeat.

Two admonitions: "Be strong." "Stay strong." Be  \'bē\ Definition :to have, maintain, or occupy a place, situation, or position. The first admonition indicates a conscious and willful decision to be strong, to face whatever comes every day. Used in a sentence: I choose to be in a place and situation where I am surrounded by positive energy, love, understanding and support from friends and family.  In this place I am able to draw strength from within myself, to willfully decide to BE strong every single day. Stay  \'stā\ Definition :to continue in a place or condition :to stand firm :to take up residence The second admonition--to remain where strength is, to sustain it and continue to fight the good fight. Used in a sentence: In the most unlikely of places and from the most unlikely people, I am reminded to STAY strong, for my feet to be firmly planted on the ground, to make strength of heart, mind and body the house I live

This is what 250 meters above sea level looks like Where the air is life For your weather-beaten body And mind Where the cawing of The crows declare You are alive! you are alive! This is what remorse looks like. As if the fear and anticipation Never bore you down As if  You never wished for A thing as impossible As a force field to shield Your boys as fiercely As You possibly could.  This is what relief looks like. An answered prayer To a desperate pleading "Please not again, not again. " This is what 250 meters above Sea level looks like High. Above. Rise. Up. Wide. Open. Begin again. Clear. Precise. This time richer. This time better. Stronger. And then you Remember, Reminded time And again,  "We grow stronger in the places we are broken." “The world breaks us all. Afterward, some are stronger at the broken places.” -Ernest Hemingway, Farewell To Arms

I miss you  in the quiet spaces.  Such as those that  wake me in the morning--  A stream of light flooding,  the smell of your shirt,  the smoothness from Being worn over and over  The Shuffling of your feet  towards  The bedroom door Your fingers gently  Turning the lock  So as not to wake me  And Our boys Grains of coffee beans Grazing your fingers  Sagada wafting  Through the air Beckoning  My still sleeping body To rise, and  I do As with all beckonings Of my heart I wonder why But not long I just take  One look  At two cups  steaming You reading in  The morning light  And me taking my place  In the quiet space beside you remembering,  Ah, this is why.  This is why. 

I used to have a personal spot where I write and read my favorite books over and over again. I would pile them on the table and admire their mere presence. Then Typhoon Haiyan came and drenched them and everything else to the core. So I had to throw them all away.  It would be accurate to say that my heart broke when I did what I had to do because it meant I was forced to cut off something that has been a precious part of who I was at the time. Yes, it was just material. Am I being shallow? Maybe. Am I being human? Absolutely. We all have things that are meaningful to us because in one way or another, they symbolize our identity. For some jewelry represents a luxury earned for many years of hard work. For others an array of clothes, shoes and bags represents a wholeness of what wasn't in one's past. And for the enlightened few, they've reached a point where they see all material things as mere mediums or vehicles, if you will, to take them to places of pur

Pack light. Bring only what is necessary to wherever you may go. Lay it all down. Spread it all out: tickets, passport, money, clothes; tops, bottoms, shoe wear, accessories. Ask the questions: For how many days? What places to go? Do I really need to bring those stilettos? Or would comfy flats do? Do I really need those many tops to go with those many pairs of jeans? One suitcase. Or a backpack perhaps. How to know that what you packed is enough? Wear your backpack. Can you still move around without straining your back? Lift your suitcase. Can you sustain carrying it for the duration of your travel without the aid of a porter? Pack light. In travel as in life. Such sound advice. Family. Friends. Virtues.  Family in blood or not. What matters is whenever you're with them you feel safe. You can be who you want to be, who you are without fear of judgment or reprimand. They root you to what is essential. Yet they give you wings to soar high. Friends. You don'