Morning Meditation

"Hokusai says look carefully.
He says pay attention, notice.
He says keep looking, stay curious.
He says there is no end to seeing."

    Yesterday morning a brown shrike perched on one of the branches of our Avocado tree, which was directly in my line of sight from my place at the breakfast table. The iron grills of our screened veranda perfectly framed the bird in diagonal parallel lines. It shivered and looked this way and that and pecked at its own body. And then it became completely still. I looked at the shrike for what seemed like quite a long time as it remained on that branch for what seemed like an eternity. The morning was quieter than usual and nothing else seemed to move nor make a sound. I could hear nothing save for the thumping of my heart and quickening and calming of my breath as I watched the movement and stillness of the bird.

    I am inclined to believe that this is the same shrike that perches on our water tank staying longer than other birds, as if pondering about life. As if it is cajoling me into its space of pondering as well. But who really knows? It could just simply be that my attention now has been drawn to birds and so I am seeing more of them. There have been more quiet spaces now in my life than ever before so perhaps I'm seeing the Shrike in the same reflective way. Needless to say, I am finding myself satiated, more content than ever before. Dare I say, happy even.

    I believe there is a practice within the practice of  presence which is to hold one's delights in only one's heart. Not needing to announce it to the entire world. Contentment. A quiet appreciation of the joys and pleasures in life. I have yet to come to terms with this constant tension between personal retreat and the need to be witnessed by others. As Roger Keyes says in his poem, Hokusai Says, "There is no end to seeing," so must I see that this tension will always be there. To just be curious in this aspiration for contentment and the need to be acknowledged. No judgment, just an open space of allowing. I tell myself now that even in the state of meditation I arrived at while observing the brown shrike in its minute movements and what seemed like eternal stillness, one that I haven't been able to arrive at for quite some time now, it is absolutely alright to share it with the world, to have them witness my experience. I am after all a human being simply having a human experience, just as I allowed myself yesterday morning, at the breakfast table, entering the brown shrike's space of quiet contemplation. And perhaps in my sharing I can cajole others into this experience of contentment, inviting them to witness my own space of dare I say, happiness, allowing them to contemplate on their own definitions of contentment and happiness as well.

"Contentment is life living through you.
Joy is life living through you.
Satisfaction and strength
is life living through you.

He says don’t be afraid.
Don’t be afraid. 

Love, feel, let life take you by the hand.
Let life live through you." 

-Roger Keyes